Momento Espírita
Curitiba, 19 de Agosto de 2019
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ícone Parents as gardeners

Indeed, on the planet of the little prince there were, as on all other planets, good and bad herbs. Therefore, good seeds, from good herbs; bad seeds, from bad herbs.

But the seeds are invisible. They sleep in the secret of the earth until one seizes to awaken.

Then it will stretch and throw timidly an inoffensive little twig to the sun.

If it is a rose-bush or a radish, we can let it grow at will. But when it is a bad plant, we must destroy it soon, barely when we recognize it.

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We can read in the words of the inspired Saint-Exupéry a synthesis on education.

As parents we are gardeners, and the more attentive and dedicated we are, the more beautiful our garden can be.

Our children bring invisible seeds, planted in other ages - they are their tendencies. They are under the earth. No one knows what they are and when they will manifest.

They are not virgin earth. Only a hasty and inattentive look judges that way.

And when these first tendencies emerge, only the alert gardener, who takes care of the plant daily, can perceive.

There are growers who will only notice their plants after they are grown, when the branches are already strong, when pruning what is not goodis already much more difficult.

It is not only that. They also lose the pleasure of seeing them in all their stages of development, with their peculiarities and beauties.

But who is there, with his eyes on the earth, will soon notice, and if it is not a good thing, like a rose-bush or a radish, he quickly prunes it.

This means that negative trends, when observed and worked early, are more likely to be modified. The work is hard, but the sooner you start, the broader are the chances of success.

Why are you acting this way, my son?

Do you have any idea how the other person is feeling about what you have done?

Is not it better to share with me? Are you angry? Let us talk about it?

Pruning, in the language used here, does not mean smothering negative feelings, or forbidding children and young people to feel this or that. No, it only aggravates the situation.

The pruning here is a careful trimming, a confrontation of the intimate contents that is done openly, including, sometimes, depending on the case, the help of professionals of the area.

Simply reprimanding or prohibiting, this or that feeling or behavior, without working them, without trying to understand their origins in the children, can bring enormous losses, such as lack of acceptance and frustration.

The attentive horticulturist celebrates the arrival of the good plants and tries to water them, to light them, to give them good conditions so that they grow with vigor.

Good parents reinforce their children's positive behaviors and not only correct and punish them all the time.

Congratulations on your efforts! You deserved this victory! It's your merit. I really enjoyed this attitude! Do this always! You have acted correctly in this situation. I am very happy!

It is a daily work, it is a meticulous care with each child, attending each plant in its specific need, because this plant has certain characteristics and that one has others. It is a real art.

Therefore, as parents, let us not neglect them. If we take on this important mission, let us be the best gardeners possible within our possibilities and limitations.

Spiritism Moment Team, based on text from the book
The Little Prince, by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry.
April 22,2019.

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